My father has several euphemisms for swear words, including something akin to bat buono. I cannot print the exact wording. It’s easy enough to curse—coming up with a descriptor like “condensed owl feces” like my father says takes real talent
Ask if he was going to do something specific or go somewhere, Dad says, “If the Good Lord is willing and the creeks don’t rise.”
My maternal grandparents said certain phrases repeatedly. My grandmother, who was a registered nurse, often nagged at my grandfather about his habits of eating high-fat food. He looked at her square in the eye and said, “One meal at a time, LeNore.”
My adult child has been subject to the whims of language in our own three-person family. We’ll save those for another day, or 30 years from now when our son is writing his own newspaper column about his odd relatives.
Amy Abbott is an Indiana-based writer who pontificates and kvetches on a bi-weekly basis in a dozen Indiana newspapers. If you happen to know what the heck a drap is, drop her a line at firstname.lastname@example.org.