“Just hold the check steady and I’ll take a photo of it,” I instructed my wife, as I grabbed the camera phone.
“Not the way I look, Dick. Wait until I put on some make-up.”
“You’re not going to be in the picture Mary Ellen. They just want the check.”
“Don’t they need a photo ID?”
“Very funny. OK, I’ll hold the check at arm’s length and snap it myself.”
I handed the cell phone immediately to my wife for her approval. “Is that a good picture of the check?” I asked.
“No, but it’s a great photo of your thumb. At least I hope it’s your thumb.”
I was determined to do this correctly, so I taped the check to the fridge, stood back and tried again. I didn’t get quite what I wanted, but I now had a great shot of me staring blankly at a refrigerator door. I think this selfie thing could catch on.
I tried a few more times, but I kept getting error messages that my photos were fuzzy, the camera wasn’t steady, or the amount wasn’t legible. I never got this kind of flak from Brad, Sarah, Miranda or John at the bank, so why was I putting myself through this?
I went back to my branch and told the entire staff that I preferred their outstanding customer service to using some cell phone gadgetry. I plan to continue banking there on a regular basis. Unless, of course, I can find an app that will laugh at my jokes.
Dick Wolfsie is a television news reporter, syndicated humor columnist and author. He can be reached at Wolfsie@aol.com.