Published: February 09, 2010 08:23 am      

Want to know a secret?

The Beatles once sang a top-10 tune titled, “Do You Want to Know a Secret?” Actually, it wasn’t much of a secret: “I’m in love with you,” crooned the Beatles.

If my memory is correct, there were lots of girls – mostly girls with single digit IQs – claiming to be the inspiration for that song. But that’s another column. 

A friend recently passed on a Web site which allows individuals to post secrets anonymously. The secret is shared via an online postcard and some of the secrets are humorous, but most of them are rather sobering. As much as I hate to admit it, I enjoy an occasional glance just to see the latest secret. 

For example, a frustrated employee got tired of his lunch being stolen at work. His postcard read, “Someone kept stealing my lunch from the fridge, so I made a nice sandwich with lettuce, tomato and cat food.” Almost makes me want to sing that old Purina theme: 

“Meow, meow, meow, meow.

For those who like to collect junk, here’s an admission to remember: “I’m a professional, and I make over $1 million a year. Yet, when I see an interesting pile of garbage, I always stop and look to see if anything is worth taking.” I guess one man’s trash really is another man’s treasure.

Ever notice that sometimes you get what you ask for, only to discover you wish you hadn’t? One young lady shared her disappointment like this: “I got pregnant so he wouldn’t leave me. Now I want to leave him.”

A popular axiom reminds us to, “Follow the money.” Apparently, one woman is doing just that. “Whenever I visit my elderly mother, I steal something because I know when she dies, my siblings will try to cheat me out of it.”  (Note to self: Go home and take an inventory.)

Just before Valentine’s Day this secret was posted: “I sent myself flowers on Valentine’s Day so people at work would think I was dating someone.” Ouch. I would have sent myself chocolate. At least you can eat that.

These secrets have been compiled into a book (the online version refreshes weekly) called, “Extraordinary Confessions From Ordinary Lives.” Misery must still love company because sales have been brisk.

I’m no psychologist (I found out in grad school that I’m a lousy counselor), but I find it terribly interesting that people are so willing to bare their souls to the rest of humanity, provided their identity is cloaked behind the veil of anonymity. Is that therapeutic or sick?

Granted, some things ought to remain a secret forever. Jesus said that our giving ought to be done in secret, our praying should be closeted and our dieting (Matthew 6:4, 6, and 18) should happen quietly.

The Bible offers a different way to release the hurt of secret sin. David prayed, “Cleanse me from my secret faults” (Psalm 19:12). Do you want to know a secret? Secret sin should be confessed, not posted.

• Tony Thomas is a church pastor, a high school basketball coach and author of “A Smidgeon of Religion.” He can be reached through the newspaper at ptnews@pharostribune.com.