Remember the U2 song from the ’80s “Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”?
I’ve not only had that song stuck in my brain for a week, I’m also living it. Neither is fun. Both, actually, are excruciating.
I moved last Sunday and woke up in my new digs on Monday morning sicker than a dog. And sick is how I’ve stayed all week. The kind of sick that makes you tired just walking to the fridge and back. If that made me tired, how was I going to unpack all those boxes stacked up everywhere? The answer, as it turns out, is I won’t. I learned that answer the same way I learn everything — the hard way.
After taking a long nap, I woke up with a tiny spark of energy. Having not experienced that since catching this ridiculous cold, I decided to capitalize on it and do some unpacking. Bad idea. Though I got a few boxes emptied, it wasn’t worth the price I paid. It caused a coughing fit that just wouldn’t stop until my head was pounding and I was heading back to bed.
So, where does that leave me? With a houseful of boxes and constantly uttering the words, “Now, darn it, I know I saw that somewhere.”
Boxes have been opened and moved around so much that it’s impossible to keep track of where I last saw something. Knowing I’ve seen it recently and now needing it, I will go looking for it. I think it was in this stack, I’ll tell myself. So I’ll go fishing through the stack, looking in the already-opened boxes. Haven seen it recently, it has to be in one of the open boxes, I surmise. When I don’t find it in that stack, I’ll think maybe it’s the stack on the other side of the room and move my search there. Again fishing out the open boxes. Not finding it, I mumble, “Now, darn it, I know I saw that somewhere.” So I move on to the stack of boxes in the kitchen. After not finding it there, I move through all the stacks of boxes and come up empty-handed. I then decide maybe I’ve had too much cold medication and that I’m possibly delusional, and I go back through the stacks. This time, though, I’m opening new boxes. This scenario plays out more often than not with me not finding the item I’m looking for. Along the way, though, I’ll see items that I think, “Oh! That’s where that is! I’ll have to remember it’s in this stack.” And when it comes time to need that item, this whole vicious circle begins again.
The house is so chaotic that I can sit something down and go to retrieve it 5 minutes later to find it missing. Where could it have possibly gone? I don’t actually know. But I have a hunch the boxes are selling their contents on ebay while stealing the stuff I’ve already unpacked.
But that might be the cold medicine talking.
Misty Knisely is managing editor of the Pharos-Tribune. She can be reached at 574-732-5155 or firstname.lastname@example.org