Pharos-Tribune

Columns

May 17, 2013

WOLFSIE: Writing on the walls

Sometimes when I am trying to think of an idea for my column, I just stare at the wall. That’s not a bad thing, because on the wall in my home office is a collection of special pieces of memorabi-lia that inspire me to write, reminding me of the talented people I have had the privilege to meet.

SOUPY SALES PHOTO: I have friends who have snapshots of themselves standing next to world leaders like Ronald Reagan, Mother Teresa and Bill Clinton. I can do better. You can’t see my face in this photo in my office because Soupy Sales deposited a pie in my kisser after he exited an elevator at a downtown hotel and grabbed the creamy projectile out of a waiter’s hand. The premise was pre-planned, but the TV segment was shot live and perfectly timed. The result was sweet.

LETTER FROM STEVE ALLEN: I always revered Steve Allen. In 1988 we did a show together to commemorate the opening of MGM theme parks in Orlando. During the interview, I imitated one of his classic TV bits when he would get irate at stuff in the news and throw the paper down in mock anger. Two weeks later, I got a personal note from Mr. Allen saying that he had seen the video and thought it was “very funny.” I only look at that letter when I wake up every morning and before I go to bed.

ART BUCHWALD DISPLAY: When Art Buchwald was in a hospice in 2005, I wrote a story about how he influenced me. I sent him a copy of the piece along with a photo of us together in 1968 in his Washington, DC office when I was a humor columnist at George Washington University. Buchwald responded to my letter by sending the column back with his autograph and a note: “Glad you made it as a writer…I was sure you’d be arrested for holding up 7-Elevens.” All my Buchwald memorabilia is now in a huge frame, including some of his signed book jackets and the original pictures of us. How big is the display? My wife wants to take it down someday and install a bay window, instead.

GARFIELD DRAWING: After I interviewed cartoonist Jim Davis, he left for a meeting. But I had forgotten to ask him to draw Garfield as part of the taped segment. His assistant called Mr. Davis, who then graciously turned his car around and came back to his office to do the drawing for me. This always reminds me what a genuinely nice guy Mr. Davis is. No fat cat, there.

CHAMPION BEAGLE: Cartoonist Gary Varvel celebrated the winner of the 2010 Westminster Dog Show with a drawing of the winning pooch in sunglasses standing by a newspaper stand that heralded his victory, the first time a beagle had ever taken top prize. The caption: Joe Cool. Gary sent the original to me in memory of my old pal Barney, who never won a ribbon…just a few thousand hearts.

Finally, I have on my wall a signed comic strip from cartoonist Charles Schulz, a thank-you gift from his corporate office after an interview. I asked a friend who is an autograph expert to appraise it. He told me it was probably not Schulz’s signature, but was signed instead by his secretary. How much is it worth? Peanuts, he told me.

Dick Wolfsie is a television news reporter, syndicated humor columnist and author. He can be reached at Wolfsie@aol.com.

1
Text Only | Photo Reprints
Columns
  • KNISELY: Adventures in cat spaying If you're a regular reader of this column, you know I have a cat. I got the cat to deal with the mice. Even if you only pop in on this column from time to time, you still likely know I have mice and that I hate them. I complain about it quite regular

    April 20, 2014

  • GUTWEIN: Strengthening Indiana for Hoosier veterans America's legacy was built on the foundation created by our brave service men and women. Whether they defended our nation's borders overseas or assisted Hoosiers during the harsh winter months, we need to do everything we can to make Indiana the best

    April 20, 2014

  • CEPEDA: Baseball's sacred temple Call it a character defect, but I don't like baseball. And I especially don't like the Chicago Cubs -- losers I never found lovable. I grew up less than a mile west of Wrigley Field and games there represented summer-long inconveniences such as midda

    April 20, 2014

  • HOWEY: Doctors Brown and Bucshon become seekers Seated across the table from me at Cafe Patachou were Drs. Tim Brown and Larry Bucshon. Dr. Bucshon was a heart surgeon from Newburgh. Dr. Brown is an emergency room physician from Crawfordsville. What made this breakfast meeting extraordinary is tha

    April 20, 2014

  • WOLFSIE: High-tech got you down? I love where I bank. It's a branch inside of a big supermarket. I can make a modest withdrawal and then go and blow every last penny in the cookie aisle. The tellers at the window appreciate me. They know about my obsession with round numbers and und

    April 18, 2014

  • PETERS: Grizzly bear may help human medicine I've gained 5 pounds since last summer. My body mass index (BMI) is still fine, but I need to stop gaining to keep it that way. Grizzly bears put my weight gain to shame. In the late summer, they eat some 50,000 calories per day and gain more than 1

    April 18, 2014

  • WILLIAMS: Feelings of the flowers I took one of those fun tests on Facebook to see what kind of flower I am and lo and behold, it said I was an orchid! That is so wrong because I have always thought I was the exact opposite of an orchid. I'd characterize myself as a daisy. You know,

    April 17, 2014

  • HAMILTON: Government as innovator? You bet! Five years ago, the federal government spent $169 billion to fund basic research and development. This fiscal year, it's down to $134 billion. People who believe in public belt-tightening applaud drops like that. I understand why: there are many reas

    April 17, 2014

  • PARKER: It's time to take a joke, America In selecting Stephen Colbert to replace David Letterman as host of the "Late Show," CBS has waged war on America's Heartland -- or so proclaims that Palm Beach font of heartland mirth, Rush Limbaugh. Don't you believe it, Heartlanders. But wait, ther

    April 16, 2014

  • KITCHELL: Forum about adding answers, subtracting questions A week from tonight, Logansport residents and those outside Logansport who purchase electricity from the Logansport Municipal Utilities will have a chance to find out some things for themselves. A free forum at McHale Performing Arts Center will feat

    April 16, 2014

Hyperlocal Search
Premier Guide
Find a business

Walking Fingers
Maps, Menus, Store hours, Coupons, and more...
Premier Guide
Poll

Should mushroom hunters be allowed to forage off-trail in Indiana state parks?

Yes
No
Undecided
     View Results
Featured Ads
AP Video
Raw: Greeks Celebrate Easter With "Rocket War" Police Question Captain, Crew on Ferry Disaster Raw: Orthodox Christians Observe Easter Rite Ceremony Marks 19th Anniversary of OKC Bombing Raw: Four French Journalists Freed From Syria Raw: Massive 7.2 Earthquake Rocks Mexico Captain of Sunken SKorean Ferry Arrested Raw: Fire Destroys 3 N.J. Beachfront Homes Raw: Pope Presides Over Good Friday Mass Raw: Space X Launches to Space Station Superheroes Descend on Capitol Mall Man Charged in Kansas City Highway Shootings Obama Awards Navy Football Trophy Anti-semitic Leaflets Posted in Eastern Ukraine Raw: Magnitude-7.2 Earthquake Shakes Mexico City Ceremony at MIT Remembers One of Boston's Finest Raw: Students Hurt in Colo. School Bus Crash Raw: Church Tries for Record With Chalk Jesus Raw: Faithful Celebrate Good Friday Worldwide Deadly Avalanche Sweeps Slopes of Mount Everest
Parade
Magazine

Click HERE to read all your Parade favorites including Hollywood Wire, Celebrity interviews and photo galleries, Food recipes and cooking tips, Games and lots more.